Soosed News Patrol

If anyone wonders why you shouldn't go on amusement park rides, it's because sometimes they'll tear your feet off. It was just announced that Kaitlyn Lasitter, the girl who had her feet torn off at Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom, has had one of them reattached.

'Kaitlyn's doctors were able to reattach one of her feet. At this time as Kaitlyn continues her recovery the likelihood for a positive outcome to the surgery remains encouraging. "We have successfully reattached Katie's right lower extremity. We were not able to reattach the left lower extremity due to the severity of the injury. Things are progressing as expected over this first ten days," said Dr. Douglas Weikert, assistant professor of Orthopaedics and Rehabilitation.'

I'm kind of hoping they will reattach the other foot. I mean yeah, a girl's life will be restored, but think of the bar tricks. We can reattach parts after ten days? Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

"Hey Jimmy, watch this. Here I'll cut this offajsldfalk;jdh OWW!! Okay! Take this thumb around the world on a vacation. I'll be here when you get back and we'll attach it back to my hand. See you in ten days bitch!"

Sign me up!